For many people, the beginning of the year marks a fresh start. I have seen many posts about New Year's Resolutions & plans for 2016, everyone seems really motivated to change their life, lose weight, spend less money on beauty products (I'm also guilty of that) or drink more water. I really enjoyed reading all these motivational posts, a lot of them were very inspiring and I originally planned to jump on the bandwagon and write a post about challenging yourself and how to reach the goals you set. However, the past few days & a video I watched made me change that. I realise that sounds a bit odd but let me explain.
A few days ago I was sitting on my bed jotting down notes for my post. I had had a pretty stressful week so far, there were plenty of other things on my mind keeping me from focusing on the actual blogpost. Instead I was sitting there feeling stressed & worried thinking about when to write this post so it could go up on Thursday (that was the plan). As I was taking notes I also had a look at my New Year's Resolutions which include living a healthier life, saving money, blogging regularly etc and I suddenly noticed that I had pretty much failed the NYR which I considered the most important: living life to the fullest & worrying less. While I was living a healthier life, blogging at least twice a week and saving money I had forgotten that this isn't what it's all about. The real challenge for me isn't getting fitter or being in a better financial situation, the real challenge is living life, as weird as this sounds. So while I was sitting there worrying about worrying too much (great, right?) I stumbled across a video on YouTube. It was Louise talking about 2015 and she mentioned how she'd gone to Seattle to visit one of her best friends. What she said next really got me thinking. She talked about how she had carried a heavy tray full of worries and other things dragging her down and how her trip helped her to make that tray lighter. She literally unloaded her life of worries and thought about what really mattered to her: her daughter, work and herself.
After watching this video, I made a decision. I wanted to unload my tray. I was carrying around all these worries and fears and I got so caught up in trying to reach my other goals that I neglected the one that was the important to me. Life isn't a champaign reception - you can't stand there and wait for others to take a glass of your tray, you have to make it weigh less yourself. What is the point in having a great body or a 'perfect' (not that it exists anyway) blogging routine when you're unhappy? After watching Louise's video I thought about what really mattered to me. And I nearly emptied my tray completely. University certainly matters, but it doesn't start until September. Absolutely no point in worrying about that right now. The other things that really matter to me are friends & family, and self-expression. Don't get me wrong, blogging matters to me, a lot, but it shouldn't matter so much that postponing my posts makes me feel stressed. It is a hobby in the end and I will upload whenever I got the time and whenever I will feel like it. Just like eating healthy and working out is great, but having a cheat day is perfectly fine, if it makes me happy. I realise that sounds a bit strange but I'm quite a perfectionist and like to fully commit to my goals. That's why I failed at living life to the fullest, it is something that is a lot harder to commit to, it isn't a clear goal. It requires listening to yourself, being flexible and letting go of matters you cannot influence. Why worry about a student job you're doing, you can only give your best and if it doesn't work out, a new door will open. It is easy to get distracted and forget what really matters in life. The thing that should be most important to us, is making life better for ourselves. Do what you feel like doing, have an off-day, go on an adventure or spend the entire day at home, whatever you feel like. Sometimes we get so caught up in life that we forget to live it. And I'm going to change that.